Because independence grows faster when connection first
When I started high school, nobody prepared me for what it would feel like to have no familiar faces.
I didn’t walk into a classroom full of people I knew.
I walked into a world of strangers — and carried the weight of trying to belong by myself.
Because belonging doesn’t happen automatically.
And independence doesn’t grow in isolation.
Stepping into the unknown
The Reality of Walking in Alone
Year 7 was a complete shock.
On the first day, I didn’t know anyone — and I didn’t have a teacher’s aide for the first few weeks. I felt completely alone in a world where everyone already seemed to know each other.
I did have a cousin one year above me, but my mum was clear from the start: she had her own friends and her own life. She wasn’t there for me to rely on or carry me through the day.
So I walked into high school with no familiar faces beside me.
Belonging begins with someone who makes the world feel smaller. And sometimes, one familiar face can change everything.
One familiar face can change everything
The Buddy System - And the Pressure It Brought
The buddy system wasn’t how I wanted to make friends.
I didn’t want to rely on peers for support — I wanted to be seen as a friend, not as the student with a disability, and definitely not a responsibility. For a few weeks it was fine, but it quickly became uncomfortable. I felt like I was holding them back.
And the pressure from everyone — teachers, peers, and expectations I never asked for — became overwhelming.
I wasn’t bullied, but the whispers, the giggles, and the constant questions chipped away at my confidence.
My schoolwork to my hairstyle — everyone had something to say.
On the hardest days, I would find my cousin at lunch. She saw me for who I was, not because of my disability. And sometimes, that was the only safe moment in my day.
The school counsellor and my year advisor were happy for me to come and talk —
but their offices were upstairs, in a part of the school I couldn’t access.
So even when support existed, it wasn’t physically reachable.
And that added a layer of loneliness most people never saw.
Support only works when students can reach it
Why Familiar Faces Matter More Than People Realise
Familiar peers aren’t just comfort — they’re anchors.
They provide:
- A sense of safety
- Predictability in a new environment
- Someone to sit with, talk to, or quietly stand beside
- A model for navigating new social rules
- A bridge into conversations, groups, and routines
For students with disabilities, familiar faces aren’t a “nice-to-have.”
They’re a transition tool — one that softens the edges of a world that can feel overwhelming and unpredictable.
Because safety isn’t just physical - it’s social
Connection is the first step to confidence
What Happens When a Student Has No One
When students walk into high school with no familiar faces, they spend more time surviving than learning.
Without social safety:
- Confidence drops
- Anxiety rises
- Small setbacks feel bigger
- Friendships take longer to form
- Academic engagement suffers because emotional energy is drained
It’s not that students can’t cope.
It’s that they shouldn’t have to cope alone.
Belonging is the foundation - not the reward.
It’s hard to learn when you’re trying to survive the day.
When Support Finally Arrived - Everything Shifted
When I finally received a teacher’s aide, it was only for three hours a day.
The education department assumed I didn’t need full-time support because I hadn’t needed it in primary school — but high school was completely different.
More academic demands, less downtime, and far more pressure to keep up socially.
Eventually, my principal stepped in and made it clear:
If full-time support wasn’t approved, I would only attend school for three hours a day.
And that changed everything.
Once I had full-time support:
- The buddy system naturally faded away
- The pressure lifted
- I had space to learn, not just survive
- I finally felt like I was moving forward
- I had chances to talk to classmates in a natural, comfortable way
Support didn’t make me dependent.
It gave me the confidence to grow.
The right support doesn’t limit independence - it unlocks it.
Access shapes belonging
Why Familiar Faces Matter - Beyond My Story
Familiar faces aren’t just about comfort.
They shape confidence, belonging, and emotional safety.
When a student walks into high school already connected to someone they trust, everything feels less overwhelming.
Everything feels more possible.
Connection is the first step to confidence
High school new demands - long before I had
This is what familiar faces create — ease, connection, and safety.
What I Want Every Parent and Teacher to Know
Some students don’t need a crowd.
They just need someone.
Independence grows faster when belonging comes first.
Confidence develops when students feel seen.
And transition becomes less frightening when familiar faces walk beside you.
Every student deserves someone who sees them.
Closing Reflection
I didn’t have any familiar faces in high school.
And some days, that made me feel invisible.
But now, I understand just how powerful those familiar faces are.
They’re not just friends.
They’re safety.
They’re belonging.
They are the difference between surviving school — and thriving in it.
Because every child deserves to arrive - not just endure.
If this story resonated, come connect with me on Instagram at @challengesbehindacceptance— a space for community, encouragement, and everyday reminders that belonging matters.
I didn’t have a familiar face in high school - but I’m here to help make sure other kids do
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